Chatty Tchotchke

“What has eyes yet cannot see?” says the sphinx.

“It has been doing this since I took it out of the crate,” says Mr Foxe.

“Why was six afraid of seven?” says the sphinx.

“Does it have some sort of switch to turn it off?” says Mr Boxe.

“How do you make a sausage roll?” says the sphinx.

“I didn’t switch it on,” says Mr Foxe.

“What goes around the world but stays in one place?” says the sphinx.

“This is insupportable,” says Mr Boxe. “Do something.”

“Why did the chicken cross the road?” says the sphinx.

“If I knew what to do,” says Mr Foxe, “I would not have requested your assistance.”

“What is the most expensive fish?” says the sphinx.

“Do you suppose it is possessed?” says Mr Boxe.

“What has a tongue but cannot talk?” says the sphinx.

“Possessed by what?” says Mr Foxe, “The ghost of a Christmas cracker?”

“What letter of the alphabet holds the most water?” says the sphinx.

“Have you tried answering it?” says Mr Boxe.

“You know I’m no good at riddles,” says Mr Foxe.

“What dog keeps the best time?” says the sphinx.

“A pointer!” says Mr Boxe.

“No,” says the sphinx.

“I beg your pardon,” says Mr Boxe, but I believe I know the nature of canines far better than you can claim to.”

“Try again,” says the the sphinx.

“Wolfhound,” says Mr Boxe.

“No,” says the sphinx.

“Bichon frisé?” says Mr Boxe.

“Now you’re only mucking about,” says the sphinx.

“I don’t know!” shouts Mr Boxe.

“Tut,” says the sphinx. “And that was an easy one. How embarrassed you must be.”

“Foxe,” Mr Boxe hisses, “fetch me the coal shovel.”